


Baby, What We Got is Magic

by Soulb0und



Category: Neko no Ongaeshi | The Cat Returns
Genre: Alternate Universe - Hogwarts, Baron gives everyone around him a migraine but they love him anyway, F/M, Fake/Pretend Relationship, Louise is a Bad-Ass, Magically Induced Shenanigans, Multi, Other, Slow Burn, Toto and Muta are Total Bros
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-11-22
Updated: 2016-11-21
Packaged: 2018-09-01 10:41:04
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,805
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8621344
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Soulb0und/pseuds/Soulb0und
Summary: Several hundred teenagers stuffed full of angst and magic are shoved into a castle together for nine months out of the year. Really, it's  a miracle the world still turns.





	

“You know, I’m fairly sure you can’t cast a love spell at all, never mind wandless and nonverbal. But go ahead Haru, prove me wrong.”

“Hiromi!” Haru whirled around in her seat, her ponytail nearly smacking Chika in the face. She winced, and snuck a look at Louise, whose desk they were right next to. Louise was a sixth year, who helped teach potions classes to train for her eventual position at St. Mungo’s as a healer dealing with botched potions. Louise shook her head and leveled Hiromi a look.

“Hiromi, that wasn’t nice. You look at Tsuge the exact same way.” Louise’s tone was barely scolding, and pitched too low for the rest of the class to hear. “However, neither of you should be looking anywhere except your cauldrons. This one can be dangerous if done incorrectly, so if we could keep our minds off boys for a few minutes?”

Hiromi and Haru both colored while Chika bit her lip and shot her eyes down to the textbook, shaking slightly as she tried to hold in her laughter. Everyone liked Louise, and the Gryffindor/Ravenclaw joint class was lucky enough to have her for three out of four Potions classes with Professor McIntyre.

Satisfied that the two Gryffindors matched their uniforms, Louise left to do a circuit of the rest of the class to find which groups needed help. Hiromi’s eyes shot back over to the dark haired Asian boy Haru had been pining after from before. As much as she wished her friend happiness, she knew none of Machida’s romances worked out.

But that didn’t stop her friend from feeling inadequate every time Machida’s eyes slide over their group to flirt with his girlfriend. She saw Haru’s head start to drift back over her shoulder to watch the exchange. Luckily, Haru had the world’s best distraction as a best friend.

“You know Haru, If you wanted to put in the Salamander heart, you should have said so.” She quickly scrapped her share of the hearts they were supposed to be dicing on her friend’s plate and took over stirring the cauldron- two stirs clockwise and then one cutting through the middle at a brisk pace.

“Hiromi! That is so gross!” Haru scrunched up her nose, but she also began dicing the hearts and she wasn’t mooning over her shoulder anymore, so Hiromi counted it as a win.

After Potions class (one close call on an explosion, but only because one student stood too close to the fire and his robes caught became slightly singed) Haru and Hiromi waved off their Ravenclaw friend and meandered their way to the Great Hall. The two girls sat at their table and began to pile food onto their plates. One with much greater enthusiasm than the other. Haru despondently pulled over a ladle-full of cabbage soup and frowned into her reflection. Hiromi slide over a spoon and tucked some of Haru’s hair behind her ear, startling Haru into looking up.

“You shouldn’t sigh over a boy, Haru. There isn’t even anything cool about Machida anyway. Not like my Tsuge-”

“Ah, yes, tell me more about this Exploding Snap champion who has stolen my friend from me. I never hear about him. Oh, wait.” Haru punctuated her last word with banging her head on the table. For the next couple of seconds, whenever Hiromi started a sentence Haru lightly banged her head on the table, until Hiromi laughed and pushed her away from the table by the arms.

“Alright, Alright! I surrender. I don’t need you losing any more brain cells.” She snorted. The two fell into a companionable silence as they ate. The Great Hall was nearly empty this time of day, only thirty or so students within, and Haru let the unintelligible sounds of friendly conversation wash over her. The windows behind the teachers let in the golden late-morning light, and whenever a student rushed over to speak with a friend at another table it sent the dust motes swirling in a lazy dance.

It was picturesque. It was also ruined not half a moment later with the screech of a window opening, followed by the much more organic (and numerous) screech of the school’s mail system.

Haru opened her mouth, but shut it when an owl flew above her just long enough to drop a package almost right on her food. She startled up and lunged over, almost falling into the table herself. Hiromi steadied her absent-mindedly as she started eating her food again. Haru blew her hair back off her face and turned the package around, although she already knew who it was from.

“Your mom does realize that we have quilts here at school right?” Hiromi asked, not even looking up to confirm that the package was in fact from Naoko.

“I think she thinks if she stuffs them with enough charms and sends enough of them I’ll change my mind and want to study in Japan again.” Haru answered steadily. She loved her mother, she did, but portkeys were a thing! Travel by floo, another thing! Hiromi hummed next to her in understanding. Haru sighed, and dropped the package without opening it, not noticing the letter attached drop to the floor. It was swept along by a passing student’s robes until it was gone.

 

 

 

Toto McIntyre practically rolled off his broom. His dark skin was flecked with sweat, but he was fairly sure Muta looked worse. Toto rolled onto his back, and sure enough, Muta was three feet away and gasping. Baron was conspicuously absent, which meant he had probably ditched the free for all because he spotted Louise.

“Hey, Fatso-” Toto started, but between gasping for his next breath and the one after that he gave up and settled himself in the grass. Up on the knoll he could see his uncle chatting with Professor Moon. She handed him a box of jars and walked down to greet them.

“Don’t tell me you boys are all tuckered out already.” She said dryly. “The Toto who I remember would have taken four hours to crash.” She leaned over to get a look at his face. Toto’s uncle followed up behind her and set the box down in the grass. The two were as different as night and day. Toto’s uncle, Professor Orrin McIntyre was put together in the dark purple suit he wore under his robes, and his jet black hair was usually cropped close to his head, but currently had grown out just enough to see the beginning of some truly untamable curls. His skin was dark, and he was well known for being a bit of a social butterfly, making friends easily due both to his friendly nature and his abilities next to a cauldron.

Logan Moon on the other hand, was a light-skinned woman who always dressed in light tans and browns. It didn’t always compliment her coloring with her carrot top hair, but it made sense given her position as the Professor of Care of Magical Creatures. She usually had a machete tied to her side, but had forgone it for the visit. She was not fond of strangers, but she loved working with the teens. Toto wheezed, and his uncle snorted before checking on Muta.

Satisfied that the younger, heavier boy wasn’t going into cardiac arrest, Orrin scooped his box of jars back up like a much loved pet. “Thanks for bringing this over, Logan. Baby fifth years are making amortentia tomorrow.” Orrin gently kicked his nephew in the shin. “And this one needs to be back in time for curfew. I’m not covering for you for the groundskeeper again. She gives me the willies.” Orrin danced out of the way of a slap.

“Is that any way to talk about the woman who went through all the trouble of getting you ashwinder eggs?” Moon leaned back down and hauled Toto to his feet. He dusted himself off, and they both went to help up Muta.

“But I thought you liked snakes.”

“You’re head of Slytherin, you are a snake. You get to be the one to burn your fingers next time.” Moon made a face at Muta. “McIntyres, am I right? Think they’re too pretty to do anything.”

Muta huffed. “Sure, they think they’re pretty…” he trailed off meaningfully while his best friend glared at him.

Toto and Muta both launched themselves at their brooms and sped off towards the castle, dive bombing each other and hurling insults the whole way. The two adults laughed, and turned back to each other.

“You will be careful this year, right? I don’t want to hear about any boys or girls smuggling that nonsense out of that classroom of yours. Again.” Moon looked him seriously in the eyes, and while she wasn’t fearful, she was wary. “Last time you ended up getting dosed. I mean, nothing a trip to Mungo’s couldn’t fix, but it was still creepy.”

“Honestly Logan, you worried? What kind of example will that set for your son?” He edged away. But Moon grabbed his arm and hauled him back in.

“One to be careful. Really Orrin. It isn’t that I don’t trust you. I do. That one just has so many ways to go wrong. And in my opinion it shouldn’t be taught to anyone at all, never mind a bunch of teenagers.” Moon looked back over to the boys, now small against the bulk of the castle. Moon smirked. “On the other hand, you in love with your reflection has given me years worth of teasing material…”

Orrin laughed, and headed towards the castle. Waving a hand over his shoulder as a familiar, easy goodbye.

 

 

 

When Toto and Muta finally barreled inside the castle, shoving and shouting, Baron was just coming around the corner. The sixth year flattened himself against the wall just in time to avoid being flattened by his friends. The younger boys didn’t even register his presence as they rushed to collide again.

“WAIT!” He shouted, only to be knocked the ground. The two boys skidded to a stop and looked at their friend, only to begin laughing uproariously.

“I’m- I’m sorry Baron,” Toto started between giggles, “But you look so rumpled!”

Muta, on the other hand, did not have any such reservations. He was slumped against the wall, his shoulders shaking up and down. Baron pulled his robes away from his face and gave the both of them an entirely unamused glance as he brushed himself off. 

“And here I was, coming to fetch the both of you so you wouldn’t be late for dinner.” Baron said, brushing dust off his sleeve, only to have his arm grabbed by Muta as he was bodily hauled towards the Great Hall.

“Dinner? Why didn’t you say so!” Muta exclaimed. Toto’s arm was also captured, and both of the smaller boys were dragged back the way Baron had come. Toto and Baron leaned back just far enough to see each other over their friend’s back.

“You know, I do believe something you’ve said has struck a chord with him!” Toto mock whispered to his friend. Baron’s lips twisted up as he tried not to smile. The Slytherin was technically used to this treatment. Muta had, after all, man-handled him and Toto when they were both young. It was less a matter of bullying and more a matter of him being used to having to push large animals around to get them to respect him at a relatively smaller size. After he had realized that humans don’t always work on those levels, he had stopped picking Baron and Toto up and moving them when they were in his way.

Their parents had thought it was hilarious. A nine year old Baron, being moved around by a taller seven year old, had not.

It had been a few years since Muta had last displayed his strength, so Baron didn’t entirely fault him for it, despite his dislike of it. He was eager to arrive at the Great Hall as well, although for entirely different reasons.

The three zoomed through the doors to the Great Hall, arm in arm, perfect examples of inter-house relations for anyone who bothered to look. Toto shoved Muta in the shoulder, hardly swaying the older boy, and they all plopped down at the Slytherin table. Baron did his best to discreetly look around, but Louise failed to appear from the throng of exasperated Slytherins around him. Toto said some sly comment about the sagging of the bench beneath them, and Muta casually leaned over onto him until Toto’s chest touched the table and he gasped a dramatic plea for help. 

If nothing else, his fellow Slytherins could admit his friends never left anything to be desired in the entertainment department. Baron leaned back again ignoring Toto’s death cries and looked down his side of the table again for Louise. He sees several blondes in black robes, but none of them Louise.

As the sun begins to set, the ceiling lights up in a dazzling display of pink and orange, which softens to a deep purple before the candles begin lighting above their heads. Baron idly notes the sweeping manner of the candles and wonders if they register darkness in their periphery in order to light, or if they light automatically with the sunset. He tried to remember if he’d seen them lit on a stormy afternoon before he’s distracted by the appearance of food across from him.

Immediately Muta smacks Toto’s hands away from any and all garnishes.

“I wasn’t going to do anything with them!”

“Yeah, you were, and I don’t need anybody to turn purple tonight because you decided to be a nerd and see what happens if you add green leafy stuff to weird bubbling orange stuff.”

“That happened one time, you can’t hold it against me”

“I CAN hold it against you because it happened to me! And fifteen other people!”

“Consider it a distraction designed to stop you from eating and therefore facilitate weight loss; You’re welcome.”

“Do you even listen to yourself?”

Muta gestured widely at his friend, and looked over at imploringly at a group of seventh-years. “Ravenclaws.” he groaned, and his eyes turned skywards, a prayer for patience.

“At least I’m trying for progress through trying something new, and not just shoving other animals into the mud.”

Alice Fox rested her head in her hand and waved her wand. Toto and Muta’s plates began serving themselves. Baron supposed there were some benefits to being the entertainment for the evening.

“Other animals? You trying to say something birdbrain?”

“Trying to? I literally said it to your face and- and you’re too thickheaded to figure out whether it’s an insult or a compliment!” Toto turned to Miranda Brooks and huffed out a conspiratorial “Hufflepuffs!”.

Muta took a large, pointed bite out of a chicken thigh, chewed, and swallowed.

“I’m gonna be the bigger man here and let the animal comment go in favor of-”

“You can’t help but be the bigger man you-”

Normally this was the point a brawl would breakout, but a group of girls swept past them. Muta shot up. “Ow! What the hell?” He ducked down, and came back up to the table with an envelope tucked between his middle and ring finger.

One of the first years across the table and several people down tried to tuck herself down under it to make the Hufflepuff show her what he had, but was lazily apprehended by a fifth year of no apparent relation with a bored reminder to mind her manners. The first year eyed the closest route (past the head table) and slumped in her seat.

Toto eyeballed the letter and went for the garnishes while Muta wasn’t looking. The same fifth year who had been minding the first years drew their wand and casted a shielding charm.

“Jabbed me in the ankle, felt like a pixie bite” Muta grumbled to his side, not noticing how he had lost his partner in his comedy act. Baron hummed from his other side and leaned in for a closer look.

“Are those Chinese or Japanese letters? It can’t be Korean…” Baron trailed off, and Muta unsubtly handed the mystery over as well as the letter and focused back in on his food.

Flowers were growing into the table. Muta eyed the forget-me-nots taking over his plate and looked down the table to find his best friend presenting a clutched handful of light blue flowers to Alice Fox. Muta glanced back over to his dinner, which was now in the process of becoming compost. He grumped and made sure his books weren’t touching the parts of the table afflicted with the spreading flowers, then picked up Baron’s plate and re-served himself some food.

**Author's Note:**

> I've been planning this out for so long. But I'm a really slow writer, so this is gonna take a while.  
> I just really wanted to start posting things today.  
> One of our turtles at work was basically being cannibalized by the others and treating him put him in so much pain, so I wanted to focus on something else for a little while. Setting up an AO3 account works as well as anything else, and it's something I've been meaning to do for a while.


End file.
